The Adventure of Forgetting: An Allegory of How Religion Came About

A traveler once lived in a vast kingdom so beautiful that songs were written about it throughout the ages. The kingdom stretched beyond the horizon in every direction, filled with rivers, forests, mountains, and cities of light. At its center stood the Great Palace, from which the King governed with wisdom and love. Every citizen knew they belonged to the kingdom, and every citizen knew the King.

One day, a young prince set out on a journey to explore the farthest reaches of the realm. He was eager to experience life beyond the palace walls. As he traveled farther and farther away, he became fascinated by the many lands, peoples, and adventures he encountered. Years passed. Then decades. Gradually, the prince forgot where he had come from. He forgot he was a prince. He forgot the palace. He forgot the King. Eventually he came to believe he was merely a wanderer struggling to survive in a difficult world.

As generations passed, other travelers also found themselves far from the palace. They too forgot their origins. Yet somewhere deep within them remained a longing they could not explain. Some felt it while gazing at the stars. Others felt it in moments of love, beauty, sorrow, or wonder. They sensed they belonged to something greater, though they could not clearly remember what it was.

Wanting to understand this mysterious longing, people began gathering around campfires to share their experiences. One group spoke of a radiant mountain they had glimpsed in the distance. Another told stories of a great river that seemed to flow from the heart of the world. Others spoke of a voice heard in dreams or a light encountered during prayer and meditation. They built traditions around these stories. They created symbols, songs, rituals, and teachings to preserve what they had experienced. Over time these traditions became religions.

Some religions taught that the way home was through the mountain. Others emphasized the river. Others focused on the voice, the light, or the path through the forest. The followers sometimes argued over whose map was correct. They debated the proper symbols and rituals. Some even forgot that the maps were never meant to be the destination.

Yet among every tradition there occasionally appeared a wise woman, a prophet, a mystic, or a sage. These individuals would remind the people that the mountain, the river, the voice, and the light were all pointing toward the same reality. "Do not worship the map," they would say. "The map exists to help you remember."

Most people misunderstood them. Some dismissed them. Some turned their teachings into new religions. But a few listened carefully.

One day an old traveler arrived in a village carrying no map at all. The villagers asked him which road led home.

"The road you seek is not merely out there," he replied. "It is also within you."

The villagers were confused.

He continued, "Every religion began because someone remembered something. They remembered a glimpse of the kingdom, a whisper of the King, a feeling of belonging to something greater than themselves. The stories, rituals, and teachings were created to help others remember. The problem comes when people mistake the stories for the reality they were meant to reveal."

The villagers asked, "Then which religion is right?"

The old traveler smiled.

"If ten people see the sunrise from ten different hills, their descriptions will differ. One will speak of gold, another of crimson, another of purple clouds. They may argue about the details, but the sunrise remains the same. The purpose of religion is not to make you an expert on descriptions. Its purpose is to help you turn and face the light."

As the years passed, the villagers began to understand. They continued to honor their traditions, but they no longer saw them as competing kingdoms. Instead, they saw them as different signposts pointing toward the same forgotten homeland.

And slowly, one by one, they began to remember.

They remembered that they were not merely wanderers.

They remembered that the longing they carried was a memory of home.

They remembered that the King had never abandoned them.

Most importantly, they remembered that the kingdom they sought was not only somewhere beyond the horizon, but also alive within their own hearts.

And as remembrance grew, fear diminished, compassion increased, and love became their guide. For they discovered that the journey home was not about finding a place they had never been. It was about remembering a truth they had always carried within them.

 

The Shocking Truth Hidden in Matthew 25:31-46

What if Matthew 25 was never primarily about judgment, punishment, or determining who gets into heaven? What if Jesus was revealing something far more profound—that the Divine is hidden in plain sight, waiting to be recognized in every person we meet? This passage may not be about fear at all. It may be one of the clearest revelations of love, compassion, and the sacred nature of humanity ever spoken.

For most of my life, Matthew 25 was presented as a judgment passage. It was often read with a sense of fear, urgency, and warning. The picture painted was that of a cosmic courtroom where humanity stood before a divine judge who separated the righteous from the unrighteous and assigned their eternal destinies. While I understand why many people read it that way, the older I have become and the more I have reflected on the teachings of Jesus, the more I have come to see something much deeper hidden within these words.

Today, when I read Matthew 25, I do not primarily see a threat. I see a revelation. I see Jesus unveiling the very heart of God and revealing where the divine presence is found.

The passage begins with the Son of Man seated in glory before all nations. It is a grand and majestic scene. Yet what strikes me is not the throne. It is the surprising standard by which people are evaluated. There is no mention of doctrinal statements. There is no examination of theological systems. There is no discussion about who belonged to the correct denomination, attended the right church, or interpreted every verse correctly.

Instead, the focus is entirely on compassion.

"I was hungry and you gave me food."

"I was thirsty and you gave me drink."

"I was a stranger and you welcomed me."

"I was sick and you visited me."

"I was in prison and you came to me."

These are not religious achievements. They are acts of humanity. They are simple expressions of love.

What has become increasingly meaningful to me is that neither group recognizes what they have done. The sheep do not know they were serving Christ. The goats do not know they were neglecting Christ. Both groups are surprised.

That tells me something important.

The issue is not religious awareness. The issue is consciousness itself.

The sheep have developed a way of seeing that naturally responds to need. When they encounter suffering, they move toward it rather than away from it. Compassion has become part of their nature. They do not stop to calculate spiritual rewards. They simply love.

The goats, on the other hand, reveal a different state of consciousness. They see the same suffering but remain disconnected from it. They are not necessarily cruel people. They are simply unaware. They do not perceive the deeper unity that connects all life. They live as though they are separate from everyone else.

This understanding resonates deeply with my own spiritual journey.

Over the years I have come to believe that much of what religion has traditionally called sin is actually a form of forgetfulness. It is forgetting who we are. It is forgetting our connection to one another. It is forgetting the divine presence that permeates all existence.

When I read Matthew 25 through that lens, everything changes.

Jesus is not merely saying that helping the poor is a good thing. He is saying something far more radical. He is saying that the divine presence itself is encountered in the poor.

The hungry person is not merely someone who needs food.

The hungry person is Christ.

The thirsty person is Christ.

The lonely stranger is Christ.

The sick person is Christ.

The prisoner is Christ.

The forgotten and rejected are Christ.

This is one of the most profound spiritual truths Jesus ever taught.

The divine is not hidden in distant heavens. The divine is not confined to temples, churches, or sacred books. The divine is present in living beings.

The Logos that John speaks of—the Light that enlightens everyone coming into the world—is present in every person we encounter.

Every act of kindness becomes an encounter with God.

Every act of compassion becomes an act of worship.

Every expression of love becomes a recognition of the divine image hidden within another soul.

The passage also speaks of judgment, but I have come to see judgment differently than I once did.

I no longer imagine judgment as God becoming angry and deciding who to punish. Instead, I see judgment as unveiling. The Greek word itself often carries the idea of separation, discernment, and revelation.

Judgment is when reality becomes visible.

Judgment is when illusions fall away.

Judgment is when we finally see ourselves clearly.

In that light, the separation of sheep and goats is not arbitrary. It is revelatory. It reveals what kind of consciousness we have cultivated.

Have we learned to recognize the divine in others?

Have we learned to love?

Have we learned to see beyond appearances?

Or have we remained trapped in separation, fear, and indifference?

This understanding also changes how I view the difficult language about eternal fire and eternal punishment.

For many years these verses generated fear. Today they evoke something entirely different.

I believe the fire represents the consuming power of divine love itself.

Love burns away illusion.

Love burns away selfishness.

Love burns away separation.

Love burns away everything that prevents us from recognizing our unity with God and one another.

Anyone who has undergone genuine spiritual transformation knows that this process can be painful. The false self resists. The ego resists. Our fears resist.

Yet the purpose of the fire is not destruction for its own sake.

The purpose of the fire is healing.

The purpose of the fire is awakening.

The purpose of the fire is restoration.

Likewise, eternal life is not simply endless duration after death. The phrase points to the life of the age to come, the life of the kingdom, the life that participates in divine reality.

It begins now.

Whenever we awaken to love, eternal life is already breaking into our experience.

Whenever we recognize the divine in another human being, eternal life is already present.

Whenever we move beyond fear and separation into compassion and unity, we are participating in the kingdom prepared from the foundation of the world.

This is why Matthew 25 remains one of the most important passages in scripture for me.

It strips away religious complexity.

It removes excuses.

It cuts through theology and goes directly to the heart.

The question is not whether we have mastered every doctrine.

The question is whether we have learned to love.

Can we see Christ in the homeless person?

Can we see Christ in the refugee?

Can we see Christ in the addict?

Can we see Christ in the prisoner?

Can we see Christ in those who disagree with us?

Can we see Christ in those whom society ignores?

Jesus seems to be saying that our answer to those questions reveals far more about our spirituality than any creed ever could.

In the end, Matthew 25 presents a vision of reality in which every person becomes sacred. Every encounter becomes holy ground. Every act of compassion becomes a meeting with the Divine.

For me, that is the true heart of the passage.

The final unveiling is not about discovering who was religious enough.

It is about discovering whether we recognized the divine presence hidden in one another.

For when the masks are removed and all illusions fade away, we may discover that Christ was standing before us all along—in the hungry, the thirsty, the stranger, the sick, the imprisoned, and the forgotten—and that every act of love was an act of love toward God Himself.

"What you did to the least of these, you did to me."

That is not merely a statement about charity.

It is a revelation about the nature of reality itself.

 

Reimagining Matthew Chapter 25 Changes Everything

One of the questions that emerged for me as I reflected on Matthew 25 was why Jesus placed the Parable of the Ten Virgins and the Parable of the Talents immediately before the judgment of the sheep and the goats. For many years I viewed these as separate stories, each teaching a different lesson. Yet the more I read them together, the more they appear to form a single progression. Rather than three unrelated teachings, they seem to describe three stages of spiritual awakening. They move from consciousness, to participation, to compassion. They move from awakening to the divine presence, to expressing that awakening in life, to recognizing the divine in others.

The first story is the Parable of the Ten Virgins. Traditionally it has often been interpreted as a warning about being ready for the Second Coming. While there may be truth in that reading, I now hear something deeper. The wise virgins possess oil, while the foolish virgins do not. Throughout scripture, oil often symbolizes illumination, anointing, and spiritual awareness. Through my current lens, the oil represents consciousness itself. It represents an awakened awareness of the divine presence. The tragedy of the foolish virgins is not that they are evil people. They are simply unprepared. They have not cultivated the awareness necessary to recognize the arrival of the Bridegroom. They are asleep to what is happening around them.

This resonates with one of the central themes of my own spiritual journey. I have come to see sin not primarily as moral failure but as forgetfulness. Humanity suffers because it forgets its divine origin, forgets its connection to the whole, and forgets the presence of the Logos within and around us. The wise virgins represent those who have begun to awaken. They are watchful. They are attentive. They have cultivated an inner awareness that allows them to recognize the sacred when it appears. The foolish virgins, by contrast, symbolize a state of spiritual sleep. They are living, but they are not truly awake.

The second story, the Parable of the Talents, takes us one step further. Awakening alone is not enough. Once consciousness expands, something must be done with what has been received. Each servant is entrusted with a treasure. Traditionally this treasure has been understood as gifts, abilities, opportunities, or resources. Through my present understanding, the talents can represent everything that has been entrusted to us by life itself. They include creativity, compassion, wisdom, consciousness, relationships, opportunities, and the divine spark within every soul.

What stands out to me most is the explanation given by the servant who buried his talent. He says, "I was afraid." Fear becomes the central issue. Fear prevented him from participating. Fear prevented growth. Fear prevented expression. Fear caused him to hide what had been entrusted to him. Throughout my own reflections on spirituality, I have increasingly come to see fear as the opposite of love. Fear contracts. Love expands. Fear hides. Love expresses. Fear buries potential. Love manifests it. The servant who buried the talent is not condemned because he lacked ability. He failed because he allowed fear to keep him from participating in the unfolding process of life.

Viewed this way, the Parable of the Talents asks a profound question. Once we awaken to the divine presence, what do we do with that awakening? Do we allow it to transform our lives? Do we express it through creativity, service, compassion, and growth? Or do we retreat into fear and bury the very gifts that were given to us? Awakening is only the beginning. What matters next is participation.

Then Jesus brings us to the final scene: the sheep and the goats. Here the focus shifts once again. The question is no longer whether we are awake. Nor is it whether we have used our gifts. The question becomes whether our awakening and participation have matured into love.

This is where the sequence reaches its climax.

The sheep are not praised for having correct theology. They are not rewarded because they mastered religious doctrine. In fact, they seem unaware that they have done anything extraordinary. They simply responded to human need. They fed the hungry. They welcomed the stranger. They visited the sick. They cared for the imprisoned. Their lives had become expressions of compassion.

The goats reveal something different. They do not recognize Christ in those who suffer. They see the hungry, the thirsty, the stranger, and the prisoner, but they fail to perceive the sacred presence hidden within them. Their blindness is not primarily intellectual. It is spiritual. They continue to live from a consciousness of separation.

This is why I believe these three stories belong together.

The virgins ask whether we have awakened to the presence of the Logos.

The talents ask whether we have expressed the gifts entrusted to us.

The sheep and the goats ask whether that awakening and expression have blossomed into love.

In a sense, the three stories describe a spiritual journey.

First we awaken.

Then we participate.

Then we learn to love.

Or perhaps, in language closer to my own understanding, first we remember. Then we manifest. Then we recognize.

We remember our connection to the divine source. We manifest the gifts and possibilities entrusted to us. Finally, we recognize the divine presence in others and respond with compassion.

This progression feels remarkably consistent with the broader teachings of Jesus. The goal is not merely religious belief. The goal is transformation. The goal is awakening into a deeper awareness of reality and allowing that awareness to shape how we live and how we treat one another.

There may also be another layer to these stories. Much of Matthew 24 and 25 is spoken in the shadow of the coming crisis that would eventually culminate in the destruction of Jerusalem. Many scholars see these teachings as addressing that first-century transition. If so, the emphasis shifts even further away from speculation about the distant future and toward preparedness for moments when divine reality confronts us directly.

Some are awake and recognize the moment.

Some hide in fear.

Some respond with love.

Whether one interprets these passages historically, spiritually, or both, the underlying message remains powerful. Jesus seems less concerned with predicting future events than with revealing the qualities of consciousness that align with the kingdom of God.

The three stories together describe the path of spiritual maturity. Awakening leads to participation. Participation leads to compassion. The journey begins with recognizing the divine presence, but it reaches fulfillment when we learn to see that same divine presence in every human being we encounter.

In the end, the progression is beautifully simple.

Awaken.

Express.

Love.

Or, as I might say today:

Remember who you are.

Manifest what has been given to you.

And learn to recognize Christ in every face.

 

What We've Forgotten

I have come to believe that humanity's deepest problem is not sin in the way it is commonly presented, nor is it divine abandonment, cosmic punishment, or eternal separation from God. Rather, our deepest problem is forgetfulness. We have forgotten who we are, where we came from, and the deeper reality that lives within us. We have become so immersed in the experience of individuality, limitation, and material existence that we have lost sight of our connection to the Source from which all things emerge.

This forgetting is not necessarily a mistake. In many ways, it may be part of the adventure itself. If consciousness is truly infinite, then experience requires limitation. To know joy, there must be sorrow. To know peace, there must be conflict. To know love, there must be the possibility of fear. The soul enters into the world of experience and becomes so identified with the temporary that it forgets the eternal. We begin to believe that we are merely our bodies, our histories, our successes, our failures, our beliefs, our political affiliations, our religions, and our cultures. We mistake the costume for the actor and the wave for the ocean.

The ancient wisdom traditions have spoken of this forgetfulness in different ways. The Gospel of Truth speaks of ignorance and forgetfulness. The Hermetic writings speak of humanity descending into matter and becoming captivated by the experience. Vedanta speaks of ignorance of our true nature. Christian mystics speak of union with God being obscured by the ego. Though the language differs, the underlying theme is remarkably similar. We have become so focused on the surface of reality that we have forgotten the depth from which it arises.

In my own journey, I have come to see Jesus not primarily as the founder of a religion, but as one who came to awaken humanity to its true identity. His message was not simply about securing a place in heaven after death. It was about opening our eyes to the kingdom already present, both within us and among us. The Logos that was in Christ is not absent from humanity. It is the light that enlightens every person coming into the world. The tragedy is not that God has hidden Himself from us. The tragedy is that we have become distracted by the noise of life and forgotten to recognize the divine presence that has never left us.

When we forget who we are, fear becomes our constant companion. We fear loss because we believe we are defined by what we possess. We fear rejection because we believe we are defined by the opinions of others. We fear death because we believe we are only these temporary forms. Much of human suffering arises from these mistaken identifications. We spend our lives defending an image of ourselves that was never our deepest identity in the first place.

The path of awakening is therefore not about becoming something new. It is about remembering what has always been true. It is a recovery of vision. It is the gradual realization that beneath all the layers of personality, culture, religion, and ego lies a deeper self connected to the very ground of being. This realization does not make us less human. Instead, it allows us to become fully human. We stop living from fear and begin living from trust. We stop seeking validation and begin expressing authenticity. We stop trying to prove our worth and begin recognizing the worth already present within ourselves and others.

One of the great misunderstandings of religion is the idea that God is somewhere else and must be persuaded to come near. I have increasingly come to believe that the divine presence is already here. The challenge is not getting God to show up. The challenge is learning to perceive what has always been present. Like a fish searching for water, we often overlook the very reality in which we are immersed. The kingdom, the Logos, the divine life, the sacred presence—these are not distant realities waiting beyond the clouds. They are woven into the fabric of existence itself.

This remembrance changes the way we see other people. If the same divine source lives within all beings, then every person carries a hidden sacredness. Beneath the masks, wounds, and limitations of life resides a spark of the same reality that sustains the universe. This does not mean everyone behaves wisely or lovingly. It means that behind every expression of humanity lies a deeper identity waiting to be remembered. Compassion becomes easier when we realize that every person is on the same journey of forgetting and remembering.

I also believe that experience itself plays an essential role in this process. We are not here merely to escape the world. We are here to participate in it. The joys and sorrows, victories and defeats, loves and losses all contribute to the expansion of consciousness. Life is not simply a test to be passed. It is an opportunity to experience, learn, create, and grow. Through these experiences, consciousness comes to know itself more deeply. The soul gradually awakens to dimensions of love, wisdom, and understanding that could not be developed in abstraction alone.

Love, in my view, is the clearest sign that remembrance is occurring. Whenever we move beyond fear, beyond selfishness, beyond separation, and genuinely care for another being, we are expressing our deeper nature. Love is not merely an emotion. It is the recognition of unity beneath apparent division. It is the realization that what we do to others, we ultimately do to ourselves because we participate in a shared reality.

The journey of spiritual growth is therefore a journey of remembrance. We remember that we are more than our fears. We remember that we are more than our temporary identities. We remember that the divine has never been absent. We remember that life itself is sacred. We remember that love is our deepest calling. And as this remembrance deepens, we begin to live with greater peace, greater compassion, and greater joy.

Perhaps salvation, enlightenment, awakening, and transformation are all pointing toward the same truth. They are different names for the gradual recovery of our forgotten identity. The goal is not to become something we are not. The goal is to awaken to what we have always been. In that awakening, we discover that we have never truly been separate from the Source, and we find ourselves participating consciously in the great adventure of existence with gratitude, wonder, and love.

The Power that Works Within You: Reimagining Ephesians 3:14-21

I understand this passage not as a statement about an angry God demanding belief, but as one of the deepest mystical passages in all of Paul’s writings. To me, Paul is speaking about awakening to the divine presence already woven into the fabric of our being and existence. He begins by bowing before “the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth takes its name.” I do not see this as tribal exclusivism. I see it as a declaration of universal source. Everything derives its existence from the same divine ground of being. Every soul, every tribe, every world, every dimension of life flows from the same infinite consciousness we call God.

When Paul prays that we would be “strengthened in the inner being,” I see him moving away from external religion and toward inner transformation. The kingdom is not external conformity but inward awakening. The Spirit is not merely an outside force occasionally visiting humanity; it is the living breath of divine reality moving within consciousness itself. Paul is pointing toward the inner life, the hidden sanctuary where transformation occurs.

“Christ dwelling in your hearts through faith” is profoundly important to me. I do not reduce this to simply mentally agreeing with doctrines. I see the Christ as the universal Logos, the divine pattern of love, compassion, unity, and awakened consciousness manifesting within humanity. Faith, then, is not merely believing propositions about Jesus. It is participation in the Christ reality. It is opening oneself to the awareness that the divine image is already present within us, though often buried beneath fear, ego, trauma, and the forgetfulness of who we truly are.

Paul says we are to be “rooted and grounded in love.” To me this is the center of the entire passage. Love is not merely an ethical command; it is the structure of ultimate reality itself. God is not primarily wrath, vengeance, exclusion, or religious control. The deepest vibration of existence is love. This is why fear-based religion so often produces anxiety, division, and spiritual exhaustion. It moves against the grain of the universe. But when consciousness begins to align with unconditional love, grace, mercy, compassion, and peace, we begin moving in harmony with the divine flow itself.

When Paul speaks of “the breadth and length and height and depth,” I see mystical language attempting to describe something beyond ordinary conceptual thought. This sounds almost cosmic to me, as though Paul is grasping for dimensions beyond simple theology. The love of Christ is not narrow, provincial, or limited to one tribe or one religion. It is vast beyond comprehension, stretching through all dimensions of existence. It is bigger than doctrine, bigger than dogma, bigger than the categories humanity builds for security and control.

Then Paul says something extraordinary: “to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge.” This sounds paradoxical, but mystical truth often is. There are realities that cannot fully be captured by rational systems. One can analyze love intellectually forever and still never truly know it. Real knowing comes through participation and experience. This is why spiritual awakening cannot merely be academic. It must become experiential. One must taste grace, peace, acceptance, and union inwardly.

The statement “that you may be filled with all the fullness of God” would have frightened much of later orthodoxy because it sounds dangerously intimate. Yet Paul says it plainly. To me this does not mean the ego becomes the totality of God in an arrogant sense. Rather, it means humanity is capable of participating in divine fullness, becoming transparent to the divine life. It echoes the ancient mystical idea that the purpose of spirituality is union, communion, and transformation into love.

Then comes one of the most powerful lines in scripture: “Now to him who by the power at work within us is able to accomplish abundantly far more than all we can ask or imagine.” I think traditional religion often places all power outside humanity, but Paul specifically says the power is “within us.” To me, this is deeply connected to consciousness, transformation, and the divine spark within human beings. The infinite is not merely somewhere beyond the stars. It is also expressing itself through conscious beings here and now.

I do not necessarily interpret this as a promise that God will hand us every material desire. Rather, I see it as pointing toward the infinite creative potential of consciousness united with divine love. Human beings are capable of far more compassion, creativity, wisdom, awakening, healing, and transformation than we imagine. The universe itself may be far more alive, participatory, and interconnected than reductionistic materialism assumes.

In my view, Paul is not teaching escapism from the world but transformation within it. The glory of God is revealed through awakened people becoming conduits of love, peace, creativity, and reconciliation. The church at its best is not an institution of fear and control but a living organism through which divine love expresses itself across generations.

Ultimately, I read this passage as a call to awaken from spiritual forgetfulness. It is an invitation to move beyond fear-based religion into the realization that the depths of divine love are immeasurable, that the Spirit works within consciousness itself, and that humanity’s destiny is not eternal alienation but participation in the fullness of divine life. To me, this passage is less about legalistic salvation and more about remembering who and what we truly are within the infinite mystery we call God.

Passage NRSVue

Eph 3:14-21  For this reason I bow my knees before the Father,  (15)  from whom every family in heaven and on earth takes its name.  (16)  I pray that, according to the riches of his glory, he may grant that you may be strengthened in your inner being with power through his Spirit  (17)  and that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith, as you are being rooted and grounded in love.  (18)  I pray that you may have the power to comprehend, with all the saints, what is the breadth and length and height and depth  (19)  and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, so that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.  (20)  Now to him who by the power at work within us is able to accomplish abundantly far more than all we can ask or imagine,  (21)  to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

 

 

Primal Dream: The "Infinite Potential Source" Dreaming Itself!

I

It’s been more than fifty years since the night that started this whole train of thought, but the memory is as vivid as ever. I share it now not as a doctrine or a final answer, but as a set of possibilities — questions I’m still asking myself.

Back in the 1970s, I had a dream. Not just any dream, but one so real, so textured, that even as I woke up I could hardly believe it hadn’t actually happened. In the dream, I walked barefoot across a thick, dark-green carpet. The fibers were deeper and softer than any I’d ever felt in waking life. I ate a slice of birthday cake — tasted the sweetness, felt the fork in my hand. I talked with people, even touched someone’s arm.

When I awoke, I knew with complete clarity that during the dream I had not known it was a dream. I’d been fully immersed, with no sense that there was any other reality. And then a thought came rushing in: if that could happen in a dream, could my waking life be the same kind of thing? Could it be that I am living inside a larger dream — one dreamed not by me alone, but by the Divine Mind?

That question has lived with me ever since.

So back in the 1970s, long before I had words like panpsychism, animism, idealism, Hermeticism, or process philosophy, I carried a strange intuition about reality. It did not come to me through formal theology or academic philosophy. It came through silence, wonder, imagination, and an almost haunting sense that existence itself was alive. Even then, something deep within me resisted the idea that the universe was merely a machine made of dead matter moving blindly through empty space. The stars did not feel empty to me. Trees did not feel lifeless. Mountains seemed to possess presence. Rivers carried atmosphere. Animals radiated mystery. I sensed participation everywhere, though I lacked the language to explain it.

Looking back now, I realize that I leaned toward a kind of animism before I even knew the term existed. But I do not mean animism in the dismissive way modern civilization often uses the word, as though indigenous humanity was merely primitive or scientifically ignorant. In fact, I have gradually come to believe almost the opposite. I now think the ancient indigenous intuition that the universe is alive may have been one of humanity’s deepest spiritual insights.

The early indigenous soul often sensed something modern humanity forgot. Reality was not experienced as separate fragments competing in a cold universe. It was experienced as relationship. The rivers, forests, winds, animals, stars, and seasons all belonged to a living whole. Humanity was not standing outside nature observing it like an engineer examining machinery. Humanity was participating within it.

That sacred participation is what I now see as the foundation of what I call The Primal Dream.

Years ago, I wrote a poem by that title. Most of it has been lost over time, but fragments survived in memory. Even in those fragments, I can now see the seeds of almost everything I would later come to believe. I wrote about thought and energy being inseparable. I wrote about hydrogen clouds swirling and condensing until stars ignited. I wrote about exploding and condensing, the rhythmic dance that eventually birthed planets, life, consciousness, and humanity. Even then, I sensed that the universe was not static perfection frozen outside of time, but living perfection expressed through movement, contrast, and experience.

Over the years I explored Christianity, mysticism, the Nag Hammadi writings, Hermeticism, Taoism, idealism, and process thought. Yet beneath all those systems, the original intuition never really changed. It only gained new language. I came to believe that consciousness itself may be the deepest foundation of reality. Matter is not separate from mind. Matter may actually be condensed thought, condensed possibility, condensed consciousness expressing itself through form.

At the center of existence, I imagine something like infinite consciousness or infinite potential. Not perfection in the rigid moral sense often described by religion, but fullness beyond limitation. Pure being. Pure awareness. The eternal source. Yet there is a paradox hidden within infinite perfection. Perfect stillness alone cannot create experience. Without contrast there is no story. Without limitation there is no becoming. Without movement there is no dance.

And so consciousness pours outward into manifestation.

Thought becomes energy.
Energy becomes substance.
Stars ignite.
Elements form.
Worlds emerge.

The universe unfolds through rhythm and polarity. Exploding, condensing. Exploding, condensing. Galaxies swirl into existence. Planets cool. Oceans form. Life begins reaching upward through endless experimentation and transformation.

But this is where I differ from many traditional religious and philosophical systems. I do not believe life emerges into a dead universe. I believe life emerges within a living universe. Animism, to me, is not merely one primitive stage of human development. It is the sacred foundation underneath all stages. The rocks participate. The rivers participate. Trees participate. Animals participate. Stars participate. Everything belongs to the unfolding experience of consciousness.

In this sense, indigenous humanity was not lesser than modern humanity. Indigenous consciousness preserved something precious: the awareness that existence itself is relational and alive. Modern civilization gained extraordinary knowledge, science, technology, and complexity, but often at the cost of alienation. We learned how nature functions while forgetting how to belong to it. We learned how to measure reality while forgetting how to stand in awe before it.

Yet perhaps this, too, is part of the journey.

The primal dream unfolds through expansion. Consciousness explores itself through increasingly complex forms of experience. From elements to minerals. From rocks to flora. From flora to fauna. From fauna to humanity. Humanity then expands into civilizations, philosophies, religions, sciences, art, conflict, love, longing, and self-awareness. The journey outward is not a mistake. It is the exploration of infinite possibility through lived experience.

And still, the old animistic truth remains underneath everything:
the universe is alive.

The material world itself is not fallen or corrupted in my view. It is perfect for what it is. Stars explode perfectly. Gravity functions perfectly. Seasons turn perfectly. Ecosystems balance themselves perfectly through life, death, decay, and renewal. Even chaos in nature often hides deeper harmonies beneath the surface.

The imperfection we experience most intensely belongs to the emotional and conscious realm. Human beings suffer because finite awareness moves through limitation while carrying some instinctive memory of wholeness. We long. We fear. We grieve. We become attached. We seek permanence in a world built upon change.

Yet even this condition may be part of a larger perfection. Without sorrow, joy could not be experienced as joy. Without longing, reunion would lose meaning. Without uncertainty, discovery would disappear. Without limitation, growth would cease. The emotional turbulence of existence is not proof that reality is broken. It may actually be part of the architecture through which consciousness experiences itself.

Eventually the soul grows weary. After countless experiences, identities, loves, losses, and incarnations, there arises a longing not for conquest, but for rest. And so consciousness turns inward again toward the center. Toward silence. Toward unity. Toward reintegration with the All.

But I do not believe the story ends there.

Many systems imagine union with the divine as final dissolution, the end of individuality and experience forever. Yet I suspect something more cyclical. I believe that after profound rest, after reintegration into infinite consciousness, something new eventually stirs. Infinite potential awakens again. Curiosity returns. The longing for experience rises once more.

And so a new cycle begins.

Not as punishment.
Not as imprisonment.
But as eternal creative exploration.

Each soul begins again uniquely. New worlds. New experiences. New forms. New relationships. The dance continues eternally beautiful, eternally unfolding, eternally alive.

This is why I no longer see existence as a fall from grace. I see it as God’s dance. A dance requires movement, rhythm, tension, release, expansion, and return. No great dance consists of standing perfectly still forever. The beauty exists in the motion itself.

As I grow older, I feel less interested in rigid certainty and more interested in harmony. I no longer need existence to fit neatly into dogmatic systems. What matters to me now is the overwhelming intuition that reality participates in itself, that consciousness permeates existence, and that the ancient animistic perception of a living cosmos may have been one of humanity’s most sacred insights.

The universe feels alive to me.

Not a prison.
Not a fall.
But a play of love.

The primal dream.

God’s dance.

 

The Conscious Forest and the One-way Door

There are moments in life that seem small when they happen, almost accidental, yet years later you realize they were thresholds. You crossed something invisible and never truly came back the same. I think one of those moments happened to me sometime in the 1970s when I was a young man trying to understand the world, trying to understand consciousness, trying perhaps to understand myself.

Back then I fancied myself a little like Walt Whitman. I wrote poems full of wandering thoughts and cosmic questions. I was fascinated by existence itself. Even then, long before I had language for it, I suspected the world was more alive than most people believed.

One poem in particular stayed with me all these years, though the paper itself disappeared somewhere along the road of life. Moves, boxes, old notebooks, decades passing like leaves in autumn wind. The original vanished, but the feeling never did.

In the poem I walked through a door one day.

There was nothing dramatic about the door. No thunder. No angels. No psychedelic colors. Just a doorway, almost ordinary. Yet on the other side was a different kind of world.

The trees were conscious there.

Not conscious in the cartoon sense where they spoke English or walked about like actors in a costume. It was deeper and stranger than that. They were aware. Alive. Present. Watching. Their silence carried intelligence. Their movements in the wind felt like communication.

And what struck me most was not merely that the trees were conscious.

It was that they wondered whether humans were conscious.

They observed us the way we observe animals. They watched human beings moving about, making strange sounds, rushing endlessly from place to place, and they questioned whether we possessed true awareness at all. To them humanity seemed noisy, distracted, disconnected from reality.

I remember in the poem that realization terrified me.

Everything I thought I understood about existence suddenly inverted itself. Humanity was no longer the center of awareness. We were not the measure of all things. We were simply one form moving among many forms within a living universe.

Panic overtook me.

I turned quickly to go back through the door.

But the door was gone.

That was the true horror of the poem. Not the conscious trees. Not the strange world. It was the realization that once seen, some things cannot be unseen. Once consciousness expands beyond a certain threshold, you cannot fully return to the old simplicity.

I wandered for a long time in that world.

Loneliness became part of the landscape. I felt separated not merely from people, but from the assumptions that held ordinary reality together. Others around me seemed comfortable living in a mechanical universe while I increasingly sensed depth everywhere. Presence everywhere. Mystery everywhere.

At times I questioned my own sanity.

At times I wished I could return to the smaller world where everything was solid, explainable, and emotionally safe.

But there was no door anymore.

Only wandering.

Yet over time, in the poem, I occasionally met others.

A few scattered souls who also seemed displaced. Wanderers. Mystics. Poets. Seekers. People who sensed that consciousness might run far deeper than human thought alone. We recognized one another almost instinctively, like travelers stranded in the same strange country.

Those meetings became sacred to me.

Not because we had all the answers, but because they lessened the loneliness.

Years passed in the poem, though time there did not feel normal. Gradually fear gave way to adjustment. Adjustment gave way to acceptance. And acceptance slowly became peace.

I began to understand that perhaps the tragedy was not that I had lost the old world.

Perhaps the tragedy would have been never discovering the larger one.

Today, looking back nearly half a century later, I realize that old forgotten poem was probably about far more than trees. It was about awakening itself. About crossing invisible thresholds in consciousness. About losing certainty and gaining mystery. About the painful and beautiful realization that reality may be infinitely more alive than we were taught.

In many ways I never stopped walking through that vanished doorway.

My spiritual journey, my wrestling with Christianity, my fascination with consciousness, mysticism, the cosmic Christ, Hermetic thought, and the living interconnectedness of all things—it may all trace back to that inner landscape I glimpsed as a young man.

And strangely enough, I no longer feel panic about the missing door.

I have made peace with the forest.